Every Deer Related Accident In Woodland Park Caused By You Feeding Deer That One Time Two Months Ago

After an extensive investigation into the increasing number of deer found dead on the roadside, the conclusion is in. It turns out that neither local forestation issues, rutting season, or natural reasons are the cause. Instead, it’s you.

Studies show that you fed a deer inadvertently three weeks ago when you dropped a french fry from your McDonalds bag on your way into your house. While you live nowhere near the highway, the deer have instinctively determined it’s your main route into and out of town and started gathering in large groups awaiting you.

Studies show that deer are able to track your vehicle’s location for over two months after you have fed them. In addition, a single piece of food can attract hundreds of deer to stand around your local major highway. All of this while also retaining the ability to avoid your local smaller roads.

It’s all because of you. I hope you’re happy with yourself.


  1. I think this article is a joke but its right. People are the number 1 reason deer are coming to Woodland Park. Stop feeding them.

  2. I do not have a view one way or the other but everyone should want to challenge the study statements made in this article. It mentions someone accidentally dropped a French fry and ties this to people actively feeding animals. Those two actions are totally different. How did they determine animals instinctively connect cars that reside nowhere near a freeway to where that car enters and exists a freeway? That seems to be a very significant stretch. The writers of this article should share more of the specifics of the study rather than simply sharing conclusions.

  3. Congratulations on the ridiculous conclusion that every dead deer is caused by people feeding them. Deer, particularly at night when being blinded by headlights, have a very difficult time judging speed and distance. The facts are, that the deer population in many areas is excessive, hunting regulations are overly restrictive, and natural predators are few. A prime example of this would be states like rural Iowa where human population is very sparse, but food from growing corn is abundant. The deer population is disproportionately high to its natural ( non human state) Wisdom would dictate a modification of hunting restrictions.
    The core issue that no one wants to address here, is that God created mankind in His image as an eternal being, giving free will as to where that eternity will be spent to each individual.
    Deer, although beautiful, and a part of Gods creation are NOT human beings with eternal souls. Elevating them to a position of equality with humanity is seriously flawed theology. You may be asking where my basis of belief originates? Gods word the Bible. Hey, check it out. It walks all who seek to know our creator through the weeds of this very temporary life.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *