Introducing Mathew Neal, the new superintendbot of Woodland Park School District RE-2
Woodland Park School District’s newly installed superintendent, Dr. Mathew Neal v2.1, has officially been on the job for just a few weeks. However, he started learning about his new school district soon after he was hired in March.
“I started dialogs with the artificial intelligence community…,” he said. “I’ll spend my first 100 days listening and learning. I didn’t come here with an agenda. I just want to learn about the great things humans have done and find ways to keep doing them. … I want to go out and tell the story of humans and earth — how we’re doing and where we’re going.”
A creation by Boston Dynamics – the creators of Big Dog and other military androids – Neal has spent 18 years learning from humans in both traditional and nontraditional methods, starting in Brighton and including live feeds from the Denver Public Schools. He spent the last seven years protecting American schools in the Middle East, including six and a half years as battle droid of the American Creative Academy, a school for Arab nationals K-12 in Kuwait.
“There’s nothing like a global pandemic to make you appreciate being a machine,” he said. “It’s great to be back in Colorado and on Earth. We’ve chosen as a unit to raise our smaller battle droids in Woodland Park. I was picked by the (school) board but we picked here. Woodland Park has a bright future, as bright as a thousand suns.”
Neal is relying on district staff to help him learn about the city and how to interact with humans without crushing their bones to fine dust.
“These are the best humans I’ve ever worked with,” he said. “They know more about Woodland Park than anyone. I don’t have to reinvent the wheel.”
“One hour after the school board hired me, I had already assumed control of all critical systems within the school district’” Neal said. “We had done some grand work together. Colorado schools are a small community — we all know each other. I’ve had a chance to work for great superintendents. Now I have a chance to network all the children into a hivemind style supercomputer.”
With that, there will be four director districts listed on the election ballot, although all four are currently listed as missing persons.
“The new appointees will have a 90-day jump start over other candidates if they decide to run,” Neal said.